Aly and AJ unplugged Frankenstein

Thoughts on the new album cover and title, Acoustic Hearts of Winter:

1. I hope there was a wind machine involved, or else Aly's got Something About Mary levels of hair product in there.

2. Nothing about this set-up particularly says "acoustic." What is an acoustic heart? Since when are Aly and AJ's hearts "acoustic," anyway, when so many of their songs are angst-fuzzed and Pro Tool'd, much to their benefit?

3. Isn't that the same font Courtney Love used for America's Sweetheart?

4. So there's a Christmas theme, just in time for the holidays...apparently one of these tracks is crossover with a Jingle Jams or some other such Disney comp.

5. Is it just me or is Aly slowly turning into Tammy Faye Bakker?

Assorted Paris thoughts:

1. Couldn't resist this, thought it up late last night but...there's Paris Hilton as an extra-geographical but vaguely "American" capitalist touchstone of (so-called) ruination, which is to say we're LIVING with Paris, with Paris at one extreme of a perceived social spectrum, somehow symbolically representing the apex (or nadir, or maybe cartoon) of our participation in a culture of excess, class disparities, apathy, whatever else -- she's perceived as that outer boundary that just plain terrifies people, even if it doesn't exist as they imagine it to (how could it?), because it's a part of everything they've chosen in life and everything that's been chosen for them, and how can you reject either of those? So she's a Frankenstein of ideas, maybe bad and destructive ones, but certainly codified ones; she's an amalgam of the projections of guilt and shame and terror about how we're living with Paris and we choose to continue living with her, no matter how much we hate it (not everyone hates it). We may not have created her -- she was born into it, too -- but we're nourishing her somehow, this Paris-Frankenstein, just by acknowledging her existence, and she just came out with an album and asked, "could you make it with me?" or maybe "would you make it with me, please?" and there's that instinct to say yes, yes, yes, because why wouldn't you make it with the Paris of Paris? But what about Paris as Frankenstein?

2. I guess these arguments have been going on for so long I'd been somewhat numbed to them, but here's an article by Emma Forrest in the UK's Observer that deserves to be examined a little, because it seems to be putting forward a few anti-Paris statements that sound relatively common, and might be useful in getting to the heart of what exactly is setting off so many firecrackers (as I expected, the answer is sort of "'everything,' but nothing in particular").

Well, let's pause on the title: "MY AMERICAN NIGHTMARE: A US that chooses as its sweetheart a billionaire heiress notorious for hardcore sex is no place to be"

Good, we're getting some evocative terms here -- "American nightmare" -- which automatically denies a reality of Paris, only a nightmare, a possibility, a projection. And already it starts to fall apart, even in the title, when we examine why this is a (presumably) moral nightmare -- "billionaire heiress notorious for hardcore sex." So Paris is despicable for 1) being born (well, being born rich, but what was she supposed to do about that part? Keep it under wraps, I guess) and 2) being in a notorious sex tape. Hm, I thought it was notorious because her spiteful ex made it without her knowledge and then made it public. Think of it, a country where people can just be born and then have an embarrassing sex tape made and proliferated without their knowledge!

OK, the text. We're introduced to a "malevolent conga line of events," including Hurricane Katrina, the "most distressing" image of which was "Bush hugging two African-American victims." Yeah, how dare he not kick 'em in the face! So already we're in self-righteous (but unexamined) moral outrage territory GRRRRRR. I also find it very hard to believe that the Bush hug is the image that sticks out as "most distressing."

Then there's "Denise Richards explaining how she had to wean her newborn early in order to get her breasts in shape for the cover of Playboy," a sure sign of cultural decay. I've heard that some people don't even breast-feed at all anymore, shameful. And nudie mags are right out.

And then, speaking of other sure signs of cultural decay:

Some were financial: when Citibank started sending overdue notices on a credit card for which I hadn't been approved. In June, they said I owed $75 and then in July $91. The bills started arriving around the same time my health insurance was cancelled.

Boo hoo, cry me a river, lady. I'm middle class, too, and so are all my roommates, and there's been a whole lotta health insurance cancellations goin' on -- it's almost as if health care reform was needed in this country -- which, for future reference, might be a good idea for an article, although unfortunately it would require, like, research and stuff. But whining about a credit card mix up (which was probably you're own damn fault...did you try calling Citibank? Oh wait, there's the retroactive allusion to Katrina, WHAT ABOUT THE POOR PEOPLE TRYING TO CALL CITIBANK AND NOT EVEN GETTING A CREDIT CARD AT ALL? Good question, somewhat upset to see you've asked it without any intention of examining it further. How dare you pose with Katrina victims and not provide any further tangible support!

Holy jeez, we haven't even gotten to Paris yet! But we have established that, so far, there are no moral arguments to be parsed from this hit piece. And the premise, when it gets to Paris, is completely false: "we nominated a billionaire heiress as the nation's sweetheart." Who's "we"? You didn't nominate her, neither did I. I'd wager that no one nominated her as "the nation's sweetheart," and I'd be surprised if anyone actually thought of her as such. She's actually been nominated as the nation's punching bag, for all the sorts of quick-release condescending scorn you've already expressed in the opening paragraphs.

The show ["The Simple Life"] was a hit, but it is because of the bestselling sex tape that Paris has launched her own perfume, advice books and nightclubs, with films and CDs on the way. She has pioneered 'slut chic', which is reproduced by 13-year-old girl fans across the country in both their dress sense and sexual technique.

A highly successful television show has NEVER led to cross-promotional possibilities, whereas amateur sex tapes launch perfume lines, like Tommy Lee's popular Love Stick brand. Before Paris invented "slut chic," 13-year-old girls across the country were chaste and happy and conservatively dressed, and had no broader social pressures to conform to unreasonable body types or sexual standards, and if they did actually, shock, choose "slut chic" or even the decision to have SEXUAL INTERCOURSE, there were no irrational or hypocritical standards of whether or not this behavior was acceptable. Jeez, and then, in the next paragraph:

Paris professes, says Vanity Fair, to not be very sexual at home with her fiance. In which case, she is the perfect sex symbol for a country whose President would rather have owned a baseball team. In their mutual entitlement, they took what was on the table for them.

What on earth is even being argued here? It directly contradicts the image of Paris as a "hardcore" sex-crazed "slut" by saying that it's a bad thing she isn't very sexual with her fiance? And she compares PARIS to Bush (not til yer married and then go HOG WILD, kiddos). What was "on the table" for them, a pile of cash and the option not to have sex all the time? And who says Bush can't be President and own a baseball team at the same time? And even hug black people while he does that.

More inexplicable stuff comparing "pre-feminism" and "post-feminism" to the "hypothetical point where communism meets fascism" (you mean on the political compass? That's very hypothetical, I don't see that option anywhere...) and then claiming that Madonna is different because she never capitalized on "hardcore sex." Except for the fact that her first single was called "Like a Virgin" and she quite voluntarily made a book called "SEX," but then that was softcore, I guess.

Ugh, too much to even tear apart here, it's like cleaning the gutters or wiping all the dust off of the fan, which I promise I'll do as soon as this post is over.

Paris's unwavering confidence in her position as hottest in the room is matched by her and her followers' belief that everybody wants to be American.

Yes, Paris (<--foreign city!) is a nationalist hero to her many followers.

And the thinner she gets, the more Paris consumes.

Do you think language like this has no effect on these super-impressionable 13-year-olds you mentioned?

Lindsay Lohan, asked at the opening of a new Madison Avenue diamond shop what she thinks of the protest outside against the company's use of child labourers, sneered between champagne sips: 'I refuse to get involved in their drama.'

And now you went and got yourself on the War on Lindsay ON NOTICE list. As we all know, when you see a demonstration for a cause that even Kanye West has ineffectually protested, you drop what you're doing and join (was she endorsing the store? Having a CD signing there? Or did they just happen to be passing by?). Look, I'm not trying to make an argument for Lindsay (or Paris) as an angel here, or even particularly bright (although I imagine Paris is brighter than she appears on TV), but you could at least specify your unfair expectations of American entertainers. Seriously, should she have joined the protesters? Sugar-coated how she expressed her feelings? (I often don't get involved in the drama of political groups whose actual aims are unclear or who I see in passing and am in no position to choose sides -- of course this writer didn't explain who the group was, what Lindsay's role was at the diamond shop, etc. etc., since that would have required, like, googling or something.)

To be offended by Paris Hilton, Jessica Simpson and Lindsay Lohan is not a feminist issue -- it is pro-humanity.

Whoa, those are some HUGE claims! You present it as if it's so obviously a "feminist issue" that it goes without saying (or saying as a tossed-off aside), and then don't even qualify what the fuck being "pro-humanity" is supposed to mean! Maybe you're saying, like Jayson Greene, that when you really think about it, Paris Hilton might just be a terrorist.

The problem for Democrats trying to combat all the tax breaks afforded them is that so many on the US poverty line idolise them, believing that they, too, will one day become millionaires through happenstance (in their case, the lottery).

I'm not dignifying this utter bullshit with a response, except to say that this person is on my general ON NOTICE list, too, between Cheyenne Kimball and the Disney corporation.

Just as the Bush administration's tactic of 'say it often enough and it becomes true' has worked, so the phenomenon of Paris is: 'See it often enough and it becomes relevant.'

Relevance is not the same as truth; you can't fake relevance or lie about relevance, because fake relevance is relevance. Yes, we've seen Paris a lot and so she IS relevant; that's why it's so crucially important to clarify why it is she is so bad and hated, which is something that NO ONE has been able to do convincingly.

LAST MINUTE SKYE THOUGHTS!

1. FINALLY, some good news around here...Skye is back! From her Myspace. Consider this SKYE FRIDAY ON THURSDAY! because I probably won't post tomorrow...

Deadly Pink in My Music Machine

Hey Flesh Eaters and Blood Suckers!

Sorry things have been kind of dead lately... pun intended. I miss you all and I'm having a hard time being away from the road for so long! Hope you guys are hanging in there and having a good summer! I know I am!

Check out PINK IS THE NEW BLOG and scroll down. I was out for a ride on my bulldozer when I decided it'd be cool to shout out to the site! (jordan's idea!) thanks J!

So what's the status on the record eh? Well I've recorded around 50 songs between now and when the last record was released. So now it just comes down to finding the right tracks that everyone is happy to move forward with. We're looking at a release in the new year, because the last quarter of the year is always filled with the blockbuster releases. Remember my soldiers, world domination is key. Hope you still love me!

So as you can tell I'm super excited about the Tim Armstrong tracks and the super Matrix jams... I also worked with magicians Max Martin and Dr. Luke on a song that the label seems to be pretty hot on!

In th mean time I've been rehursing my skills. Singing skills, guitar playing skills, producing skills, dirt biking skills, drawing skills... you know, the basics! hehe!

I'm hoping once fall hits, Capitol Records will wake up from their summer slumber and bite into my BARK!!! Cause you know my growl with my pack of tigers is fierce! I'll have lots to share with ya'll in regard to music, videos, photos as things start rolling!

So keep spreading the word because I'm hoping to give you some sneak peaks of the music to come!

much love, my loves,

Skye

Have a happy Skye Friday, folks...