One of the most interesting recent features of Radio Disney is its "incubator," in which the teen pop stars of tomorrow are hatched and thrust upon tweensters across the United States (and Argentina). As far as I can tell, the feature only dates back to May of last year or so (a few months before I flew past the fail-safe point of obsession).
Early incubatees included B5, Hope Partlow, Emma Roberts, and Sabrina Bryan of the Cheetah Girls. Teddy Geiger, Nikki Flores, Kaci Brown, the Jonas Brothers, Cheyenne, and Jessie Daniels (all of whom I've written about before) came out of the RD crucible as well.
But the lesser-knowns are (predictably) a lot more interesting. Let's meet some of them!
DaHv
DaHv DaHv DaHv. AMAZING -- a must-have for any historical overview of kiddie-rap mix. I missed "Pass the Shirley Temple" when it made slight novelty waves last spring.
The new(er) track, "Mean Girls," is also great, with a (very) slight "Valley Girl" vibe going on. Also featured in a strange political cartoon here -- I wasn't paying close attention but the actual politics expressed are kind of shady/ambiguous.
You can listen to several of Dahv's hits in their entirety at her Myspace page.
Wait a second, omigod, is "Pass the Shirley Temple," like, wow, TOTALLY xenophobic?
My aunt runsupoff/Towith the waiter serving caviar/ Imported from Beluga/ And I think that he was, too!
Careful, young lady...thin line between tween 'tude and racism (cf. Daphne and Celeste's "I Love Your Sushi"). Granted, there is no such place as "Beluga." Is that even what she's saying there? This song is very silly. Best is when she just plain gives up and makes funny noises. Beep boop bop boo doot! BVVRRRRVVVRVVV!
The Truth Squad
Of extra special interest because THEY DO NOT EXIST. I'm sorry, I've looked EVERYWHERE for proof of this group's existence, and I've only found it at the Incubator site. And yet the Truth Squad has TWO songs in rotation ("Graduation" and "Believe")! $5 to anyone who can prove that any of these kids have actually recorded music.
They ostensibly promote the following agenda:
The Truth Squad is a vocal and dance hip hop/pop- “super group” -comprised of four uniquely talented young performers that individually have mad skills in dance, electric vocals, and an unbelievable presence. They also share a unifying desire to fight lies and expose dishonesty. Pledging to stick together through thick and thin, the Truth Squad has set out to show how friendship and trust are the keys to a better world and best of all, they do it all through phat beats and tight moves. Each Truth Squad member has spent years working, honing their craft and starring in feature films, TV shows, commercials, print ads, singing on albums and performing before millions. But “super star” resumes are not enough; these four kids understand the value of positive thinking, diversity, and hard work. All of them have exciting individual careers but recognize the value of working as a group to spread the truth!
OK, "Kid Karizz" is a cancer survivor whose latest film played at the Pan-African Film Festival and Jade was in the "Hollaback Girl" video. But this group-like entity still kind of creeps me out for some reason.
Madison Cross
Daughter of Christopher Cross. Yes, I actually paid for this. I don't want to talk about it.
More news as incubator-chasing continues. You know, it occurs to me that I was in an incubator for two whole months when I was born -- so where the hell is MY glory, huh????
SOUNDS BETTER AFTER INCUBATION
Dahv - School
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